AW YEAH SHOW ME DAT HAIR BABY I WANNA CUT DAT

It’s time once again for the New Anime Season, and it’s time once again for me to start it off with something dumb.
Kiri is a guy who has a massive hair fetish and is obsessed with cutting hair. He always used to cut his parents hair, but then suddenly they wanted to go to hair salons instead so he couldn’t cut their hair anymore no matter how much he wanted to, which for some reason requires a sombre and dramatic flashback with subdued lighting and atmospheric music like the clearly traumatizing experience it must have been. He always likes to use his handy-dandy special scissors that he inherited, that have a peculiar shape. One day he comes across a big house hidden away in the forest where a ‘long-haired ghost’ is rumoured to live – she actually isn’t a ghost, but a waifish little girl named Iwai, although her hair is still in rapunzel-ish quantities. As Kiri discovers, this is because her hair is cursed and can not be cut no matter how much one tries, which is demonstrated by Kiri PUTTING AWAY HIS SPECIAL SCISSORS AND TRYING THE HUNDREDS OF PAIRS OF REGULAR SCISSORS IWAI HAS INSTEAD and then despairing a whole lot because he can’t cut her hair. But he is still able to obsess over and creepily caress and try to inhale her hair instead, until two other girls appear who make him leave. They drop a bunch of Foreshadowing around and tell him that he will only meet misfortune if he continues to hang with her, and also apparently they’re murderers, or descendants of murderers, that use fancy weapons called ‘Killing Tools’.
In perhaps the most stupidest and sloppily-written information reveal I have seen in an anime for a while Kiri finds out from his grandfather that his special scissors are also ‘Killing Tools’ and so he goes back to cut Iwai’s hair with them because HE NEVER EVEN TRIED TO BEGIN WITH and SPOILER IT WORKED. And then they name the magical scissors ‘Crime Edge’ because that makes sense apparently. At this point the plot must only really be getting started but I honestly don’t even think I want to know any more.

I don’t even know if this was supposed to be romantic or creepy as shit but it was definitely the latter.

I honestly have no idea what the hell I just watched, other than the fact that it was terrible. It wasn’t terrible in a way that made me angry like many of the other terrible things I watch every season, it was just terrible in a ‘who the hell wrote this plot and thought it was worth doing anything at all with and why is the writing so bad’ kind of way.  I honestly can not figure out who the intended audience of this show is, but not as much as I can not figure out how seriously it wants to be taken. Because it’s ridiculous, and yet it plays so many of this absolutely stupid scenes so straight and with this gentle, serious music.
The animation isn’t bad (dumb ‘HE MADE A FUNNY ANIME FACE SO ITS COMEDY RIGHT??’ moments aside), but the writing is completely awful. The plot is dumb enough (and I don’t even know all of it yet) but there were two moments in this episode that literally made me throw up my hands and say ‘seriously?’ at my screen because of how terribly they were written. The first is the more obvious one; that Kiri inexplicably neglected to use his own damn scissors to cut Iwai’s hair until the end of the episode even though he bought them out to attempt to do it about twice before she told him her hair can’t be cut. Surely there was a better way of prolonging her hair being cut than having him literally put his favourite pair of scissors away solely because the plot wouldn’t let them be used yet. Hell, I wouldn’t care if a crow flew in and stole them out of nowhere  and he wasnt able to get them back until the end of the episode because even that kind of dumb plot device would make more sense than ‘time to cut some hair better put away the scissors I always use and love using and use all these crappy scissors here’.  The other instance was when Kiri came home, distraught over not being able to cut hair and yells ‘YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!!!!’ at his grandfather who asks him what’s wrong (I honestly thought I was supposed to laugh at this but…apparently I wasn’t), to have his grandfather out of freaking nowhere say ‘are you upset about the fact that you are descended from some murderers oh ok you didn’t know that because woops forgot to tell you anyway they used Killing Tools that were scissors with a distinctive shape!’. This was honestly such damn ridiculous, poorly shoehorned-in moment of exposition-to-advance-the-plot that I started cracking up because I couldn’t believe how bad that writing was.
Probably the most confusing thing about this to me is how the other reviews I’ve seen floating around are giving it a pretty good score and I don’t know if people know something I don’t, such as perhaps whatever this was based on being decent and the plot after this set-up being alright or something, because honestly I just want my 24 minutes back.

~their love is so deep~

Out of 5,
melon for at least being…unique???

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